Wednesday, December 05, 2007
Beloved
"... This is flesh I'm talking about here. Flesh that needs to be loved. And the beat, beat, of your heart... Love it. More than the lungs that need yet to breathe free air. More than the womb, which holds life. More than the private parts that give life. Love your heart. This... this is the prize. Amen. This the prize... Amen!"
"Let the children come. And let your mothers hear you laugh."
-Beah Richards as 'Baby Suggs' in Beloved
I can only hope the dialogue is somewhat close to that of the film as would hate to do a disservice to what I believe is one of its most powerful scenes. Seeing as how it was taken from the internet and much to my dismay, I can not recall it verbatim, I will have to rely on the help of others.
I consider myself an avid movie watcher. I even have the heavily used netflix.com subscription to prove it. Foreign and subtitled, drama, horror, documentary, 'stupid comedy' and most everything in between ...at some point, I've watched them all.
There are very few movies able to evoke tears or any other visceral reaction beyond an initial viewing, if even at all. Most that do usually have something to do with race, gender or sexuality; issues to which I am inextricably bound. Rosewood, The Women of Brewster Place **Shut up!!! I love that movie** and The Color Purple being prime examples as I cry every time I watch them. Another came to mind today and I was glad.
Beloved, the film, didn't necessarily do well. It only made a total of $28,000,000 whereas the novel won a Pulitzer Prize and although loosely based on the life of Margaret 'Peggy' Garner, is, according to a survey of 125 'eminent authors and critics' by The New York Times, considered the best work of american fiction in the past 25 years. See the 1987 review here.
Toni Morrison's irrefutable brilliance aside as I am dealing with performance not word, Beah Richards is absolutely breathtaking in this scene.
I kissed my own hands.
Also, if you haven't already seen it, I implore you to watch Beah: A Black Woman Speaks at some point in the near future. Directed by Lisa Gaye Hamilton, it's an award winning documentary birthed from over 70 hours of taped conversation on Beah Richards life and career.
bless
Friday, November 16, 2007
My retraction ...of sorts.
As is my way admittedly, I was a bit tenacious and antagonistic with regard to my exchanges on Bossip AND subsequent blog entries.
Baby Please, I'm sorry. Your comment below was sweet natured ...I appreciate it and your ability to not take things so seriously.
I hope your dinner was enjoyable and look forward to more pleasant banter.
bless
blac.sapphic
Yes, Baby Please.
One so juicy I felt compelled to reply but wouldn't detract from the subject at hand in the comment section any longer.
Even if they don't respond, I've had more than enough fun for one day **sniggles**.
***UPDATE!!!***
...LMMFAO ...Baby Please, yeah the one without time ...responded via Bossip AGAIN!!!
Blah, blah, blah ..."cheap shot" ..."skewed and unfounded" ...."never say how much time I actually do have" ... ***obviously enough to read AND write again*** ..."ok, I'm finished".
Awww, so soon??? I was having fun.
Shit, its Friday. I have all the time in the world.
Oh, and one more thing ...all you have to say is "my remarks — as quoted above — were accurate"?? No they weren't ...and I had a retort for everyone of them. You can't come any harder than that????
========================================
Baby Please
@ black.sapphic
“I’m fairly certain that ‘we’ did not.”
I disagree. I do believe a black person created this phrase.
I'm almost positive you're missing a fundamental point, I've not said this term wasn't coined by a black person, I believe it was HOWEVER, your continued use of 'we' is misleading. I will maintain that until.
“We can not imply a ‘black person’ as it is indicative of a plural AND …last I checked you were not appointed to speak for the entire race so your ‘black people’ assertion is null and void”
I have not the time nor the desire to involve myself in a conversation with you about semantics or reading comprehension. Your sentence is pompous and absurd.
I don't believe either of your assertions can be founded and think you're becoming defensive to say the least. Oh, and you do have the time ...as indicated by your next few lines. Don't worry, it's Friday ...I have time too.
“We, in this instance meaning a good majority of the people I align myself with and I, did not create nor do we perpetuate the term.”What?
I'm sorry. What wasn't clear?
“A few people may have but again, that can not be inclusive of the majority.”A few? This term enjoys widespread use in the black community.
I never said it didn't. If you'll look carefully, I said “We, in this instance meaning a good majority of the people I align myself with and I, did not create nor do we perpetuate the term.” ...and was only clarifying the we that I was referring to in MY response. Not be confused with your misappropriation of 'we'.
“Also, aside from stating its origins within the Black community, I doubt one can pinpoint anything with certainty.”… which is precisely why I posed my question to readers in my last post to you…
because I don’t know everything. And I am uncertain.
With regard to your closing question, I don't have the answer either ...but still doubt anyone can come up with one. It's too convoluted.
And for the record — you must be feeling particularly adversarial today –
duh…
when this all started, I WAS AGREEING WITH WHAT I THOUGHT WAS A GOOD POINT YOU MADE.
Awwww, thank you.
=======================================
**Note you'll find my responses in gray.
For the sake of understanding I will post a few key exchanges leading up to this below.
=======================================
@ 11:23
@ blac.sapphic
Does the fact that she is Black necessitate “baby daddy” rather than father / daddy? …and this is what newspapers print.
I think this is a very worthwhile question, absolutely.
But actually, because of what we create, whites think they have certain liberties - like using this word in “respected” journalistic forums and why Imus had no compunction about using the term “nappy headed ho.” And so on.
=======================================
@ 11:31
@ Baby Please
I so get what you’re saying however, ‘we’ didn’t create it.Respectively, you can’t attribute that term to an entire community, particularly when there is marked opposition to its usage from within.Whites often misappropriate and mistake false senses of entitlement with comfort levels. It’s instances like these that cause you to sit back and internalize the state that we’re in, where white’s, on Page Six, think that its ok to print this stereotypical garbage.
=======================================
@12:34
@ blac.sapphic
Actually, blac; I am fairly certain “we” (meaning a black person or black people) did indeed create this term ourselves. Not Whitey. The first time I remember hearing this term was in a southern rap song prolly in like 1997 or 1998. Ya’ll might know more than me about this. But this is the first time I remember hearing this term. It was indeed created by us, as I understand it.
What is the origin of this term, ya’ll?
=======================================
@1:19
@ Baby Please
I’m fairly certain that ‘we’ did not.We can not imply a ‘black person’ as it is indicative of a plural AND …last I checked you were not appointed to speak for the entire race so your ‘black people’ assertion is null and void.
We, in this instance meaning a good majority of the people I align myself with and I, did not create nor do we perpetuate the term.A few people may have but again, that can not be inclusive of the majority.
Also, aside from stating its origins within the Black community, I doubt one can pinpoint anything with certainty.
=======================================
@1:42 ....please take it to the top of this post.
Racist overtones, "pseudo intellectuals", generalizations, misconceptions and plain old stupidity.
Today I came across this gem they posted quoting the Post's Page Six.
========================================
"Carrie Bradshaw’s “Mr. Big” from Sex and the City, is having a baby with longtime girlfriend Tara Wilson (See photo above). Via Page Six:========================================“SEX and the City” star Chris Noth is about to be a baby daddy. Noth’s live-in girlfriend, actress Tara Wilson, is “about five months along”. The couple is not engaged and has no immediate plans to marry.
Aww, who knew Big was down with the brown, congrats to them."
Our clipped banter has been quite entertaining to say the least.
My initial comment:
Does the fact that she is Black necessitate “baby daddy” rather than father / daddy? …and this is what newspapers print.
Racist bullshit.
...and yes, I do post under my own name.
Happy Friday!!!
Monday, November 12, 2007
I wonder if they were the ones thrown out.
Wanna laugh harder? Read the comments left on YouTube.
Fuck the vote!!!
As a nationalist, I'd love to see a black man in office. Yeah, I'm a feminist ...a Black feminist and I know Hillary will never be given a pass. EVER.
That aside ...I'm queer and this coming election means more with regard to my fundamental rights as such.
In short, Fuck Barack Obama!!!!!
Taking Donnie 'ex-gay' McClurkin, Hezekiah Walker and Mary Mary on the road was not the way to go you fucking dummy.
...AND a lame ass attempt at damage control via a statement with respect to you not sharing his same views and toting the token gay ***but white*** Rev. Andy Sidden means nothing, particularly when homophobia in the Black community is the issue AND you could have taken Michael Eric Dyson and /or 2 gay pastors with you on your concert series to attempt to bridge the gap.
Can't fault your hustle game though.
You knew what you had to do to win over the Black south.
Asshole.
MySpace is the devil.
After endless 'I'm bored so hit me up', 'New pics - comment and I'll return the favor' and 'Check out my new song' bulletins , I'm seriously considering an account cancellation.
MySpace has grown old.
Wednesday, November 07, 2007
Ignorant much???
Actually, several times a day so as not to miss anything.
Dlisted is one I read frequently. Today I came across this.
This image was selected for their 'Caption This Contest' ...and admittedly, it could have been taken in so many different directions and actually been funny.
Of course some of the comments left by readers were ugly, racist, culturally insensitive, derogatory and the like.
I cracked a half smile at the winners comment but was absolutely appalled with the runner-up selection.
==========
Winner:
John smiled for the camera but was secretly devastated that he forgot his goat leggings at Tom Cruise's house. - Conky
Runner-up:
Travolta thought he was dancing for his supper. The cannibals however knew their supper was dancing. - Rough Rider
==========
Shocked that they'd be so bold as to choose this? I'm not.
Poor, poor taste.
Dlisted
Thursday, November 01, 2007
Meet Garvey.
All things obvious in the way that Garvey carries himself.
He growls, grunts, barks, huffs, runs, twitches and grinds his teeth ...all in his sleep while in the real world, he proffers as much protection as a wilting house plant; he's nothing more than decoration.
Soft, cuddly, timid, EXPENSIVE, passive, spoiled rotten, whiny and overly friendly ...the only way he'd harm you would be to crush you under his massive weight. See, Garvey has it in his head that he's a lap dog and if left undeterred, he will climb up in your lap for a nap. I've often let him do it and have pretty much created the monster that is Garvey, The Inept Watch Dog.
I'd like to think that he'll rise to the occasion if the need ever presented itself, but I'm not so sure.
I'll be the first to admit, Garvey does not live a life conducive to that of a large breed dog. A 3 year old, 80 lb., Lab Mix should have access to a huge backyard, take long walks daily and visit the park regularly. Garvey gets / does none of that. More often than not, his days are spent tucked off into a corner asleep and when he is active, he's amazingly clingy, attention starved and annoyingly hyperactive. You WILL play fetch, by choice or default and in one way or another, there WILL be physical contact.
He's taken to depositing his slobbery tennis ball in your lap so even if you don't want to play, you end up tossing it away and there is his cue to repeat the process OR he'll rub up against your legs as if he were a cat so that you'll touch him ...even if it is to shoo him away, never mind the fact that he is a shedding animal *ugh - he didn't always do that, it started about 6 months after I got him and by then I was attached* whose feet smell like a fresh bag of Frito's as soon as it's around about that time for him to visit the groomer.
Fortunately, he doesn't have dog breath.
Garvey is stupendous.
I adore him. We have our very own ritual greeting when I get home from work. It consists of him charging at me, full speed, like a ball out of a cannon, hugs, rubs, pats, various pet names and a walk directly across the street for him to pee. *yes, his walks should be longer but I don't have time. I walk him until he does his business, I clean up and we head home - at least 3 times a day* Afterward, he's usually ready to eat his too large dinner *on our last two visits, his vet informed me that Garvey could stand to "slim down a bit" - I like to eat, my family likes to eat ...WE EAT. No one in my company will EVER go hungry, Garvey included*.
My one complaint with Garvey is he has too human tendencies. He doesn't bark AT ALL, EVER but when he does ummmm, communicate, for lack of a better word, it's almost as if he's mimicking human speech. Scary to say the least.
Oh, and he sleeps like people do ....on pillows, with blankets, etc. Long story short, Garvey has taken over in a lot of respects, totally flipped my household upside down. I mean I can't even go out after work unless I want to come home to a brown surprise - and that ain't happening.
Did I say one complaint?
I lied.
I'm sure I can come up with several others but the one that takes the cake is as follows:
Garvey has ....shall we say, a sensitive stomach. Any little thing can set him off and he won't eat / drink for a while and back when we first got him, it raised a lot of concern and made for several trips to the vet *thank the creator for Banfield and their doggie health care plans*. This long story short, Garvey vomits ...often. As a matter of fact he did twice yesterday and once today ...but it is fairly early so that isn't saying much.
He's like a grown man after a night of heavy drinking and a few White Castle burgers too many.
...and I don't appreciate having to keep a plastic bag handy to stick his head in just in case he starts heaving, which he does for about 3 minutes before he actually erupts *blah*. I don't even get that kind of personal treatment and I shouldn't have to do that for a dog.
It's gross.
I love him though.
We're complicated *sigh*.
Sunday, October 14, 2007
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Lupe clears the air - Vibe had it f'ed up!!!
Lupe will be taking Vibe to court for defamation of character, claiming that the now infamous 'Vibe Exclusive' was actually an interview done approximately a month ago but used for the purposes of adding fuel to the fire.
Kay Slay is a bit much for me but if you can take it, here is Lupe setting things straight.
Note that although Q-Tip states they never spoke on his participation save for a conference call to plan the actual performance, Lupe insists that Q-Tip is his 'Muslim brother'.
Boo.
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
Lupe Fiasco has officially forgotten himself.
"After screwing up his rhymes during a tribute to A Tribe Called Quest on VH1's Hip Hop Honors awards show on Sunday, rap star Lupe Fiasco has quickly become a blogger's whipping boy in a drama now referred to as "Fiascogate," with new allegations from Q-Tip that Lupe was never asked by him to perform at the VH1 ceremony at all.How about we try that one more time Lupe.
...Lupe wasted no time addressing the VH1 mishap on Okayplayer. Under the screen name FNF Up Up And Away, he causticly wrote in all caps concerning the performance, "When it was initially offered to me, I turned it down because I felt it was out of place for me to be honoring them because while I was fully aware of their impact in hip-hop, I wasn't really aware of their music like that . . . but guess who wanted me to be apart of it . . . hmmmm . . . how about . . . Q-Tip!!! . . ."
the 2nd plane has officially hit the tower." Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding!!!!! I'll take Hip Hop Sacrilege for $1000, Alex.But according to Q-Tip, that wasn't the case. On the gossip blog of Miss Info, Q-Tip was reported as saying, "I'm not trying to make this any bigger than it is. But I just want to clear up one thing. . . We never hunted him down and begged him to be a part of the show or anything like that. His name was pitched to us by VH1, and we said, ok cool. The only time I spoke to Lupe about the Hip Hop Honors performance was on a conference call, which we did with the other artists too, like Busta and Common, to plan the performance."
...In the past, Roots drummer Questlove has criticized Lupe for never having heard Marauders. Most recently, Phonte of the group Little Brother gleefully added fuel to the fire. "You fuckin up, my nig. Straight up and down," Phonte posted on an Okayplayer message board. "What's even more amazing is the same cats on this site defending your arrogance and ignorance on this topic . . .you forgetting the lyrics to a classic song from a classic group on national television while paying tribute to them,
Lupe aired out his grievances exclusively to VIBE concerning the backlash to the revelation that he missed out on Marauders. "[Tribe] didn't sell 10 million records, so why would people think they had a blanket on the world like that? MC Hammer was way more popular to me than Tribe Called Quest."Umm, "Come again Pikey".
Wow buddy.It's all about hip hop vanity, Lupe explains. "Because there's kids in Harlem who right now would never ever listen to Midnight Marauders, I don't give a fuck what you do, they'll never listen to Q-Tip and they want to be rappers and they want to talk about positive things. So why would you shoot them down?"
His voice rises. "It's like, 'Oh, you ain't never listened to Midnight Marauders? You ain't expanding your horizons? Oh, you ain't real' cause they did that shit to me! 'Oh Lupe, that's fucked up man, I don't fuck with you now, I'm not buying your next album' and be dead serious!It made me feel like, 'You dirty bastards. Like how dare you.'"
Overall, the rapper appears to be more hurt than furious from the blog butchering. And he claims he'll still "never" listen to Midnight Marauders, though he's criticized for denying the fact that groups like Tribe opened doors for the lyrically-PG, happy-go-lucky form of rap he's known for. But no matter how you look at it, Lupe's refusal to throw on some headphones and pop in the album isn't about Midnight Marauders, or lack of interest at all: it's about defiance.
And his power comes from being unapologetic to critics. "Those hip hop elitists who think [Tribe] hold the crown and the copyright to hip hop," he says. "I listen to 8Ball & MJG and I think they're better than you [Tribe].""
Really Lupe? Really???
I like 8Ball & MJG ...but MC Hammer? Really???
Tell 'em why you mad son. Tell 'em why you mad.
Tuesday, October 09, 2007
40 Years Ago Today
Felix Rodriguez, the CIA and Mario Teran **and by extension the Bolivian Army are responsible for his murder.
Che Guevara June 14th, 1928 - October 9th, 1967
"He vivido días magníficos."
- Letter to Fidel Castro 1965
The VH1 Hip Hop Honors
...I just have to put this out there before I even begin the blog.
Did anyone peep dude in the audience dancing like he was the only person there???
Every time the camera happened to cut him ...man, listen. Baby boy was putting in work!!! Overtime.
*play*
Aside from a slow start, Pepa's nose looking a hot mess, Lupe's unforgivable ATCQ flub **not to mention subsequent b.s. excuse, later dismissed by Q-Tip himself ** Keyshia being dead wrong for that jacked vocal, and a premature / off base hip hop honor **no shade but there are female MC's way more deserving than Missy Elliott** the tributes to Whodini, Snoop and A Tribe Called Quest made watching the 2 hour taping worthwhile. I sat back and 'wopped' up a headache, rattling off the words to practically every song, as I clapped myself into a nostalgic tizzy.
Tell me you didn't peep Nelly get low, lol. I can't wait for the videos to hit YouTube.
Ain't nothing like the good old days; back yard barbecue's with someones stereo turned out the window, dancing for your uncles spare change.
*pause*
Oh, yeah ...and the Cowboy's came back and stunned the shyt out of the Bills.
Monday, October 08, 2007
The World Has Made Me The Man Of My Dreams - Meshell Ndegeocello
Refusing to be categorized, the melding of so many different genres with an ease and fluidity that today, is unmatched ...we have yet another banger from Meshell Ndegeocello.
I've had my copy since last week.
Undoubtedly, Sloganeer is my favorite. Simply consuming, it stays in heavy rotation. I fear I may wear a grove in the cd itself.
Coming in right behind it are Elliptical, Michelle Johnson, Evolution, Virgo, Shirk, Relief, Solomon, Lovely Lovely, ...shall I stop short of an out of order track listing?
Save for a set in Charlotte, where she seemed more like the introduction and not the headliner she is, Meshell has yet to disappoint me.
Please support her raw artistry.
**Note the version of Sloganeer now playing is not the album version. This comes from a live show in Zurich.
'I'm just a soul on the planet. Trying to do good, be good and feel good.'
...Meshell Suhaila Bashir-Shakur 'Michelle Johnson'
**UPDATE**
Praise YouTube ...I found a video of her performing Sloganeer.
Get a bang out of life.
...Suicide
Straight to paradise.
If you're the chosen...
Why don't you just
...Kill yourself now, kill yourself now.
Cause I hate all the beautiful people.
Just open your legs.
Supposedly, the song is to / about a suicide bomber. I need more time to digest it before I can draw any conclusions.
Also, I don't advocate for the taping or photographing of Meshell with out her permission as in her case, among other things, it is a health hazard ..but, please don't bother to point out the contradiction in reposting this video; I'm aware.
**Link to information re: Epilepsy
Tattoos and Drum Sticks
Tavis Barker is amazing ...actually makes the song bearable.
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
Factotum
"You can be proud of yourself today, since you probably have good reason to be pleased with your accomplishments. As others notice and acknowledge your work, you could be feeling very satisfied. Giving yourself praise is as important as anyone else offering positive feedback, if not more so. If we ourselves don’t believe what is being said to us, it will not have the impact that it is meant to have, which ought to be taken as a gift that is being offered. Many times our inner critics are the loudest voices that echo in our heads from our earliest days, and they don’t need to be true for us to listen to them. But when we acknowledge our own hard work and our satisfaction with a job well done, those voices begin to quiet with each triumph until they fade away completely. Today by allowing yourself to take pride in your work, you honor the truth of your abilities and strengths."
~Many times our inner critics are the loudest voices that echo in our heads from our earliest days, and they don’t need to be true for us to listen to them.
To say that I'm hard on myself would be an understatement. I am without a doubt my own worst enemy.
Since my abrupt departure from academia I've done nil with regard to claiming my right to aspire to a higher degree of ...anything, not that I have much of an option as my transcripts are being held hostage in lieu of a $12,000 debt owed directly to the State University of New York at Buffalo. *Insert 'F*** UB' here* It seems I've almost resigned myself to bend under the weight of my mounting personal disappointments. I managed to complete 3 1/2 years of course work in a matter of 4 1/2, all while pretty much damning my credit to hell ...so much so that the 6 months and $24,000 I am shy have become my very own dream deferred and am now one of IBM's factotums.
The joy that is life after college, lol.
I often feel detached from all that is. Resorting to contacting old professors I developed friendships with for the purposes of having them forward their current syllabi and reading lists so that I'll have something to feed my brain with. Pathetic, I know ...but wait it gets worse.
...I've never even opened the attachments they've sent.
What's interesting is while attending college, the thought of others proffering their degrees as a badge of honor replulsed me. I refused to delude myself into believeing a piece of paper validated my intellectual existance ...and I still don't.
...but I do.
My lack of a degree, in any form, knocks the wind out of me, daily. For many, having just a Bachelors is last season to say the least ...and as it stands, I'm a semester shy of one. I've managed to fall behind in the race of the 'Talented Tenth' with no idea of how I am to follow what is fast becoming a pipe dream Ph. D.
Now before you take it there, hell no I don't look down my nose at anyone who doesn't have a piece of paper granting them the special previledge of working for more than $40,000 a year, hopefully with decent benefits that extend to 'domestic partnerships' ...and I wouldn't even if I had that over priced b.s. myself. I'm simply saying that it would serve to make me feel like I hadn't blown my golden years, lol; I'm not ready to turn 25 without that damn piece of paper.
Ok, ok ...back to the horoscope.
I really need to get it together in terms of appreciating what it is I have going for myself now, as well as what I know am capable of and will do ...in time.
I'm impatient ...but things could be worse.
I could be working for a company that didn't value my contribution to the team so much so that I wouldn't be able to enjoy many of the perks I do now ...like pretty much making my own hours if I actually choose to go into the office, instead of working from home. I'm good at what I do for IBM ...damn good.
I could not have gone to college at all and been left void of the many life altering experiences that forced me to stand up on my own.
I could not have been blessed with the wonderful family my partner and I have created as well as the loving, open and accepting family I have back at 'home'. They love me ...and that keeps me sane, grounded and moving ...everyday.
...I could be doing a whole lot worse.
While I don't consider my blog work, college work, course work. I appreciate the fact that it has the potential to become an outward expression of the waning writing abilities I'm trying to reclaim and desire to dive back in to what makes me happy.
I'll be back.
~Thank you again Adam ;)